Visitation at its Best

Today was no less than heart wrenching [because really, who could resist that little face?]. It seems I'm on this weird mood cycle. I started noticing it last month - the wicked pattern of emotions I seem to be running.

The day of visitation I'm excited. I'm pumped and I'm ready to go! That feeling lasts until about 6pm when I realize I need to start getting Hailey ready to go back to her grandparents. By the time I make it to Charleston, I'm almost in tears. Once I see her driven away in their car, I break down every time. [Hell, I'm crying as I write this].

Days pass and for the first 4-5 days I'm okay. By 7-9, I'm great. After than I slowly begin to crumble. Two weeks lasts years these days to me. By the time I get to the evening before visitation, I'm an absolute disaster. I'm constantly crying. I think about Hailey constantly and all of this nonsense is eating away at me.

Thank God for my mother in law. I know sometimes she irritates me like every other person's mother in law, but deep down she's a really awesome lady and I'm very grateful for her. She knows how hard visitation days are for me. I came home and not only did she straighten up a bit, she has most of my laundry done and even changed the sheets on my bed and made it. It just doesn't get better than that.

At least now when I climb into bed tonight to bawl my eyes out, I can do so on some fresh linens. I know it isn't much to look at, but it's my bed and that makes it special. Ugh it looks so comfy - even just by looking at the picture. I think I shall have a swim in it shortly.


I'm so tired from today - emotionally, mentally, physically. Hailey had a fantastic time. We played hard, laughed hard. There was all sorts of jumping and dancing going on in this house. We ran around outside. We danced to music. We jumped on the bed [well she did anyways - could you imagine me doing that?]. We read books, watched Noggin and has nice naps. Lots of pictures were taken of said events.... Like these:

Watching Noggin. That smile lights rooms.

Miss Hailey-Mix-A-Lot playing with her music table.

Who doesn't love a good scream of laughter?

Worn out from the fun of it all.